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burka

Ever had a friend call you with no real point to the call? And it's usually during a hectic time with nothing to say? Well, that's never the case with CC, my dear friend. In fact, usually, I never get to say a word, she likes to do all the talking. But you know, I can't imagine living in New York and not having her in my life. When life confuses me, she's the voice of reason. She allows me to discover things on my own with guidance from her wisdom, charm and jaded points-of-view.

Picture: Brooklyn, 2008 

I wasn't sure what I'd be doing for New Years, I know--it shocks you, a sexy single Mexican in New York with no plans? The horror! But alas, it was true, until CC called.

CC: Girl, I can't talk for long, it's Saturday--which means it's laundry day. I have to beat those bitches down for a laundry machine.

Nando: Oh, you don't have a laundry room in the building?

CC: Oh no girl, I have to walk my ass over to the Russian laundry mat where they f*ck'n congregate to discuss where to buy the bluest eye-shadow...those whores! And girl, don't get me started on the bitches with the burkas. If I don't get there early enough, those bitches will take up five machines and fill them up with those ugly black rags. I want to tell them, "Girl, take that shit back home and rinse that bitch out in the bathroom sink with some Woolite. You don't want that shit fading or stretching cause then your husband Mohammad will be beating your ass down in the name of Allah and you'll end up on the 6 O'clock news looking crazy!" Bitch, what are you doing for New Years?

Nando: Not sure--no plans as of yet.

CC: It's settled, you're coming over to Julie's for New Years. That bitch knows how to throw a party!

Nando: Well, Ali will be with me and I don't want to leave him alone.

CC: Bring that Paki bitch with you; I haven't seen Ms. Ali since I walked the catwalk at your going away party. Girl, I got to run, I see a Russian bitch with a laundry basket walking by.

Do you have a friend like CC? Do you want one? Leave a comment. 


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